Diamond Joe

Now, there's a man you'll hear about most anywhere you go

And his holdings are in Texas and his name is Diamond Joe

And he carries all his money in a diamond-studded jar,

Never took much trouble with the process of the law.

I hired out to Diamond Joe, boys, did offer him my hand,

He gave me a string of horses so old they could not stand,

And I nearly starved to death, boys, he did mistreat me so.

And I never saved a dollar in the pay of Diamond Joe.

Now, his bread, it was corn dodger and his meat you couldn't chaw,

Nearly drove me crazy with the wagging of his jaw,

And the telling of his story, mean to let you know,

That there never was a rounder that could lie like Diamond Joe.

I tried three times to quit him, but he did argue so,

I'm still punching cattle in the pay of Diamond Joe.

And, when I'm called up yonder and it's my time to go,

Give my blankets to my buddies, give the fleas to Diamond Joe.